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• New social situations fill most people with fear and while some of us are adept at bluffing it out, the greater portion of the room will usually prefer to stick with the people they know, or hide in the shadows praying that someone will talk to them – in extreme cases, praying that they won’t. Taking the dreaded first step is always a tough one, requiring great reserves of mental strength – or at least a tall glass of Dutch courage. But according to the experts it’s all in the way you approach it.

• When people grasp the concept that to be a great flirt you pay attention to the other

• Person rather than drawing attention to yourself, it becomes more appealing, especially to people who are not particularly socially confident.

• Shift your attention to making somebody else feel good, you’ll be pleasantly surprised that when you make somebody else feel good, they will often return the favour.

• Breaking the ice is undoubtedly the hardest part of meeting someone new, so what do you actually say to get the ball rolling – presumably, “Remember my name, you’ll be screaming it later” is not a great opener?

• “Start with hello, then go out on a limb, you should tell that story, the one that makes you look like a dodo. Once you reveal yourself as human you’ll help others feel relaxed.”  

Good flirts make other people feel special and enjoy doing it. “Flirts love people and notice what makes them tick.” They also have a great attitude, one that is relaxed, fearless and outward looking”. Treat it like a game,  to win you just need to get then to smile back.” According to the experts, coaxing yourself into the kind of relaxed and playful state of mind you need for successful flirting needn’t require a personality transplant if you’re not usually the gregarious type. All you have to do is change your attitude by being conscious of your negative thoughts and changing them to positive ones. Most of us don’t approach others because we fear rejection, but flirting reduces this risk, as you’re simply putting out feelers to see what response you get before you put your heart on the line. Getting in the right frame of mind will definitely make it easier to get out there and say hi.

Flirting is useful in business, when you flirt with someone you pay them a compliment and compliments can grease the wheels of industry. Don’t confuse this with browning or being overly effusive of course, but it is good noticing other people and being interested in them. Sincere, rather than saucy. As your mother probably told you ,”it does’nt hurt to say something nice.”